Pickle Write

Pickle Write
I am a salted cucumber you can place me on many types of food. For example you can fry me in a pan or on a barbeque but I would prefer otherwise. My favorite food to be on is a hamburger for many reasons, I like all my surroundings but as much as I like ketchup I would rather have all my friends shredded up into relish lying beside me. Every single day I look forward to be eaten by someone new! My pet peeve is when I get purchased in a store by a person with bad teeth.
I can’t stand the taste of rotten teeth clenching against me and my friends. I have never really felt sorry for something else ever in my whole career of reforming but I definitely do once I see my relish friends being eaten by rotten teeth. Reforming means to be eaten unlimited times and still end up in the super market, I honestly don’t know how it happens.
Here can I tell you a little story. Once upon a time I got taken a side by some people working at the market but they weren’t just ordinary people they were the head leaders of the North American tasting program! Apparently somebody brought me in to the Market one day and said how good I tasted and the tried a sample, I felt like this could be something big.
The Tasters loved me they wanted to put me in the white house located in Washington D.C. I really wanted to go there seeing as the furthest I have ever been is Las Angeles which is on the west side of America and Washington is on the east. You could basically call this the big leagues for pickles I saw some of the most popular pickles in the world that I have looked up to my whole life and now I am sitting with them in the same room.
All my friends from my hometown Vancouver keep telling me that they saw me on TV just a couple days ago on the news for the best tasting pickle in the world right up there with the three time winner Mcharles, and oh boy didn’t he taste good it was like he almost melted in your mouth. The news broadcaster announced “I think Kinney has a chance to be just as good tasting as Mcharles is!” After a couple of weeks sitting inside the main office with Mcharles and all his pickle friends The votes came in from all over North America and including the judges, basically the only topic the people vote on is based on our name and shape not how good we taste. That makes a lot of sense because those people don’t get to taste us, only the judges do. Those judges had the best teeth that I have ever experienced. They were nice and big, white and clean! “Our votes have just come in” announced the judge. “The winner is… Chandler!” Oh well that’s great I sighed, neither me nor Mcharles won.
Well at least I have made a name for myself, when I first pulled into Vancouver all the people were canting my name “Kinney” “Kinney” “Kinney!” screeched all my surroundings. It’s funny how they didn’t believe in me but now they’re calling my name. I now look into the sky and think the world is mine I know that all my life I made it.
I have now had kids with my beautiful wife Lena. Hopefully all my relish kids will be the best tasting relish in North America; after all they do have the blood for it. In a few weeks I have to travel with my family down to Moscow the capital of Russia for another challenge I am going in, the winner gets to be sold in the most popular Market in the world which is also in Russia. The main question is how do us pickles travel like this? The answer is a dream.“WOAH! Mom I just had a dream about the pickle I ate last night, it was in a contest and it had kids that were pieces of relish and he travelled to many different cities to enter contests.” “I don’t think I should have pickles for awhile” I said to myself quietly in my room. I will never forget about that dream that was the first time I have ever dreamed about a food. I can be happy about one thing; at least it is a Saturday morning not a Monday.
My mom quietly took me aside in the kitchen and said to me, “Last night I saw you tossing and turning hollering “please win” “please win”, I didn’t know what you were doing but once you told me about the competition I started to understand and who’s Mcharles?” Mom Mcharles was the three time champion I explained. She snuck out of the kitchen, went into her room and screeched “Bradley get ready for school you have ten minutes before your bus comes!” Mom my bus doesn’t leave for another twenty minutes and you have to go to the market and buy me some pickles for breakfast. Mommy, maybe you can write me a note to get out of school so I can pick my favorite brand of pickles out called “Bick’s Pickles.” “No Bradley I will not take you out of school maybe I will get you a large can of Bick’s sometime this week but not today” sigh… I guess it’s just an ordinary day with the same rotation as always, maybe I’ll have another astonishing dream in the future…